Monday, July 13, 2015

Ministry Life - Bettelli Style

I'm not going to talk about my long hiatus from blogging because that would be boring and overdone in the "blogworld."

The last time I blogged was in November of 2014.

To say I'm a little rusty and behind would be an understatement.

So I'm just not going to say it.

And I'm not going to catch up on all the family time I missed.

I'm just going to jump back in.

I started blogging as a love letter of sorts to my kids, and I want them to look back at this little piece of the internet and see the small things that made up our lives.

Tim has been pastoring part-time (what is pastoring part-time? I'll never know because once you are a pastor, you are most definitely a pastor ALL THE TIME) since last August.

I was excited about the opportunity when we began talking about it because I knew God was definitely in the circumstances.

I said I never wanted to be a pastor's wife, and I stick by that statement.

But I knew this is what the Lord wanted for us at this time, and so we jumped in.

It was a pretty smooth transition for the most part.

The church has been exceptionally inviting and forgiving, both of which are stellar qualities to have in a body of believers.

But . . . and of course there is always a but

I'm not one to barf all my personal struggles here on this oh so private internet space, but I feel like I need to get this out.

Being in ministry is hard.

I don't feel equipped for the emotional struggle.

There are some high, highs and some low, lows.

It is a sanctification process like no other.

I thought marriage was sanctifying, and I thought parenting was sanctifying, and I thought homeschooling was sanctifying, and I thought owning a house was sanctifying, but . . . 

None of that holds a candle to this.

I mean that in the least dramatic way possible, of course.

The best way I can describe it is like being in a tunnel where all my worst faults are magnified, and I am forced to deal with them at warp speed.

It is humbling to say the least.

But I am praying more than I ever have. #silverlining?

And because I don't want this to all be about me (ya, right ... working on pride too)

The kids have actually transitioned into this whole "ministry life" quite well.

They look forward to going to church, even though we have been known to be there 5-6 times a week and sometimes multiple times in the same day.

They are extremely friendly to new people like all good pastor's kids are expected to be:)

They don't complain too much about their dad being gone many, many hours and having to hang out with their cranky mom too much.

For these small glimpses of grace I am thankful.

And I am thankful God equips who He calls.

I just wish it wasn't so painful to go through the equipping process.


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