Birthday Eve

 

 

A Letter to my Lexi on her Birthday Eve:

 

Dearest Lexi,

        I can't believe tomorrow is the day we will get to kiss your sweet face.  I am so excited and anxious at the same time.  What are we going to do with a little girl???  After two boys I feel like I have that covered pretty well, but a girl . . . a baby girl . . . we are entering a whole new world.  And I can't wait to learn all things pink. 

        You were quite the surprise, little one.  Daddy and I had not one conversation about having another baby, but there you were.  It took me a little while to get used to the idea of a third, but now I can't imagine life without you.  And I haven't even truly met you yet.  You have already had that grand of an affect on me and your little family.  George is so excited to see you he can't stand it.  Ethan knows you are in my belly and loves to give you kisses.  I think your daddy is super excited but also nervous about raising a little girl . . . that should be a lot of laughs.

        I want you to know a few things before you come out, so I decided to put them all into this letter that you will one day read about the day before you were born. 

        First, you are so blessed with so much love.  There are so many people who already love you and are praying for your little life.  Always know that your family and friends are supporting you and encouraging you . . . even from within the womb.  This is one of God's greatest blessings, and I am so grateful for the love you have been shown. 

        Second, I want to be your best friend.  From a young age I really want to work on building a strong relationship with you.  I know you will grow to be a confidant and a friend to me, and I hope to be the same for you.  You can always tell me anything, and even though your choices may have consequences that I have to administer, I will always love you and help you in any way I can.

        Third, (this is more of a plea than information) please come out quickly, as painlessly as possible, and healthy.  We want to hold you and kiss you as soon as possible, so obey mommy and get here quick.

        Lexi, you are my little angel.  You (along with your brothers) are our greatest blessing on this earth.  Your father and I love you more than you could ever imagine, and I hope you never doubt that.  You are a precious gift, and I always want to treat you that way.  I don't take for granted the blessing of children that God has given our family.

                                                                         I love you, Lexi Girl,

                                                                                                                                 Mommy 

 

 



 

Ethan Changes

 

Ethan has been experiencing a lot of changes lately . . . especially for a 2 year old.

 

Kids are resiliant, yes, but they also can feel when things are "different" even if they can't express it.

 

He really misses his daddy and his brother during this time apart.

 

He asks me almost constantly where they are.

 

He will go to the door, unlock and open it to call out their names.

 

He doesn't have a good concept of time, so he doesn't understand when I say they will be back on the weekend.

 

He only knows that a few nights a week they are here, but for the majority they are not.

 

He misses cuddling with daddy before bed.

(Daddy is definitely the better cuddler between the two of us.)

 

He misses having a playmate in George.

(He is constantly asking me to ride on the toddler "ride em" toys . . . def not happening at 9 months pregnant no matter how much I love my son.)

 

 

I try to get him out as much as possible and keep him busy, so he won't think about it.

 

But again, being so pregnant and having so many things to do in the house for the new baby it just isn't always possible.

 

The biggest way I can see a change in him is his sleeping.

 

He seems scared for me to leave him in his room at night.

 

He has always been a really good sleeper for naps and at night.

 

Over the past couple weeks he refuses to stay in his crib unless I am in the room with him, waiting for him to fall asleep.

 

But it isn't only falling asleep . . . He will come into my room in the middle of the night to get in bed with me.

 

He has to be close to me constantly.

 

He has always been super independent.

 

Never cried when I left him in the church nursery.

 

Never cared when I had my parents or sister watch him.

 

But now . . . it is a whole different ball game.

 

I can't help but feel like he has developed abandonment issues and no way to communicate them.

 

I know this is a season that we all have to experience, but my poor baby.

 

And to top it all off he is getting a new sister on Friday.

 

Oh dear . . . I can't even begin to imagine how he will feel then.

 

 

I need to do a better job just trusting God to work it all out.

 

I can't fix this, unfortunately.

 

I wish I could just give Ethan's confidence back and be done with it.

 

That isn't the case.

 

So we grin and bear it the best we can knowing that "this too shall pass."

 

Hopefully in the next two days before we bring home a brand new baby . . .

 

That isn't asking too much, is it?

 

color schemes

Last night my mom and I finally sat down to finish one of the projects I really wanted done before Lexi was born.   When I had Ethan she made me burp cloths with towel backing.   Absorbency to the maximum.   I knew I wanted some for Lexi . . . but you know, the color scheme is so different for a baby boy and a baby girl.   I am definitely using a lot of the boys' stuff for her like the blue pack & play and the blue bumbo.   But burp cloths are like a fashion statement.   And my baby girl will have fashion, ahem.   So we went with these cute fabrics.  

 

Could you just die?

 

That is only four of the six we used, but it was so, so, soooooo fun to be able to use Minnie Mouse and all things girly to make her burp cloths.

 

Here is my mom sewing away.

 

 

I was the cutting machine and she sewed all the peices together.

 

I just picked up a couple towels at Walmart for 2 or 3 bucks and we used that as the backing.

 

It doesn't get much simpler (or cheaper) than that.

 

 

We even put a little curve in the side, so it would fit over the shoulder better.

 

I know these babies will be getting plenty of use in the months to come, and I am grateful to have one more thing crossed off my list.

 

Now . . you may be wondering how we could be so productive with the wild two year old running around.

 

Another key player in this process was my dad, aka "The Babysitting Machine."

 

 

So thanks to both my parents . . . couldn't have done it without you!

 

Adding to the Brood

One of the biggest changes coming our way is the big jump we are making from four Bettelli's to five.   Yesterday was our last day spent together as a family of four.  

(I would have been on that train too, but no pregnant women allowed.  Dumb.)

 

Each time I have been pregnant, the last week or so is bittersweet.

 

I am so, so, so excited to have a new baby join our brood, but the huge change causes some anxiousness.

 

I know how we work now.

 

Before we had George, it was just Tim and I.

 

We enjoyed the freedom and the time to get to know one another (considering we only dated 9 months total before our wedding day).

 

Then George came into our world, and we literally could not imagine life without him.

 

When I got pregnant with Ethan, I could not imagine how I could love him the way I loved George.

 

I remember crying in the hospital just hours after I had him (could have been hormones) because it would never be just George and I again.

 

Now as we are days away from bringing Lexi into the family, while I am so excited to see her and dress her and love her, I can't help but feeling a little sad that we will never have this family dynamic again.

 

It will never be just Mommy, Daddy and the boys.

 

With this new beginning comes an ending.

 

I enjoy change, always have, but knowing I can never get this time back makes me stop and reflect on the family dynamic we are giving up this week.

 

Lexi will be a part of us forever.

 

She is a permanent addition to the Bettelli clan.

 

Things will never be the same.

 

Weekends

Since it is the weekend I have been thinking about writing a post on the change in our weekends over the last few months.   In our current situation (with Tim and George in Fort Myers for work and school) we only get to be together as a family on the weekends.  

    It is a really hard transition because . . .   Well, number 1 - I miss them like crazy and so does Ethan.   Number 2 - I have to be a 9 month pregnant, single mom to a crazy 2 year old Monday thru Friday.   Number 3 - It is a really difficult to transition between having the house responsibilities to myself for five days and then sharing them for two.   It is definitely not ideal, and one of the worst parts is that we don't have an end date.   We don't know when we will all be together.   We can't find a permanent place in Fort Myers until we sell our house here.   And at this point we are no closer to selling than we were on August 1st when Tim started the job.   I don't want to complain because I know there are plenty of people who deal with much worse on a daily basis.   I want to be thankful despite my circumstances.   Thankful that I have two healthy, thriving little boys and adding a little girl to the mix in the very near future.   Thankful Tim loves his job.   Thankful George is absolutely dominating kindergarten.   Thanksful for parents and in-laws who are willing to do so much to help.   Thankful for Jesus and His shoulder to lean on.   Thankful for a roof over our heads.   Thankful that we do get to be together on weekends because some don't even get that.   I want to keep that perspective minute by minute because usually I am wallowing.   It is very unbecoming.   I know "this too shall pass."   And I am praying it will pass quickly:)   

Obsessed

I have a confession.   I have an obsession.   With Pumpkin.   With the change in season comes my favorite flavor of anything ever.   This is my list of treats that I savor from September until Christmas (which is usually when places stop carrying it).  

 

Pumpkin Coffee.

 

Iced . . . Decaf (most of the time) . . . cream only.

 

I could kiss it.

 

 

Pumpkin Cookies.

 

Favorite. Dessert. Ever.

 

I make the recipe times 4 and freeze a million to have on hand at a moments notice.

 

I should give them away, but . . .

 

They are my favorite and all.

 

 

Pumpkin Bread.

 

Moist, delicious, and chocolate chips.

 

This is my first year making this, but I can assure you it won't be my last.

 

 

 

And last, but certainly not least, pumpkin ice cream.

 

Again, this was a new one this year.

 

Pumpkin flavored ice cream with chunks of pumpkin pie and crust mixed in.

 

Seriously?

 

Yes, seriously.

 

Beat Clemson

As of 36 weeks pregnant my doctor said no more traveling.  

 

Ethan and I had been in Fort Myers with Tim and George for the three weeks preceding that, so we came home to stay until Lexi would be born.

 

But . . . that very same weekend was the FSU vs. Clemson game in Tallahassee, and my brother's best friend said he could get me into the President's box.

 

 

 

So I went.

 

36 weeks pregnant and all.

 

And we all made it back in one piece (although my dad probably asked me 300 times if I felt ok . . . I think he was nervous my water would break in his nice car).

 

The game was AWESOME!

 

 

But to say I didn't enjoy the food spread almost as much would be a lie.

 

They had so many delicious choices, and since I am eating for two and all that, I got to be a total pig without anyone questioning my sanity.

 

Win, win.

 

My brother and his wife live in Tallahassee while he is in law school, so while Peter and my dad used the season tickets in the stands, Whitney came with me to sit in the box.

 

 

Yes, she is lovely and skinny.

 

And yes, my belly protrudes right into hers.

 

And then there is John, Peter's BFF and the angel who got us in.

 

 

He was my year book editor when I was the advisor way back in my days of teaching high school.

 

He is such an awesome guy.

 

Even more awesome now that he allowed me this special treat and last hurrah before baby number 3 comes into our lives.

 

Thanks, John.

 

And "GO NOLES!!!!"